Tag Archives: Fear

What’s in the box?

Stuck in the box @changethisweek
Stuck in the box @changethisweek

Last week I talked about gratitude and about better expressing that gratitude for life and love to those in my life.  This was a great week and I know a big part of this week’s greatness was due to this commitment I made.

Now it’s a new week and I am on a plane writing this blog feeling quite confined, like I’m in a giant metallic and cylindrical box, lol here comes the segue.  The thoughts of being on this plane, and after being in a tight hotel room begged the question, What box can I break out of this week?  Of course I’m not talking about a plane or a hotel room, I’m referring to the mental boxes we find ourselves in. In order to break out of a box, I first have to step back and realize what is the box that I am in and how did I get there?

I’m asking this question of myself to start and wonder how much you can relate to this issue as well. I have lived in the box for many years. The biggest box I have lived in was self created in my ill fated quest to please others. I was more often that not trying to strive for what I thought was “right” at the time or in the eyes and standards of others. My internal thought was that If I just did what was “right” then I would succeed and be accepted and rewarded by others, especially those with the keys to power. Sometimes this worked because I did achieve successes in this box. That was great except that it only encouraged me to further entrench myself in the box. A bit of a conundrum was formed and I just kept rolling along unaware and blissfully unhappy.

Through major transitions in my life, I have been made aware of this success in the box fallacy and have been working hard to get out of the box the past few years. It has taken a lot of time, making new moves but always keeping focused on making personal changes and forward momentum.  There have also been a lot of mistakes in the past few years on my new mission, but the biggest outcome I have achieved includes a lot more clarity on what I want in my life, who I want in my life and what my priorities are. This has been such a fun and rewarding experience to be living and loving in this new space.

It’s fascinating to look back at when I was so unclear but also so unaware of what limitations I was putting on myself. Now I am so much more open to new ideas and experiences that my life is really new again.  When there is a new opportunity or adventure, I really try my best to just say Yes!  If I am capable, I try it, I go with it.  I don’t need to default to my old ways and overthink it, over control it, or talk myself out of it.  I love this new space that I have created and I am committed to staying in this space. The work I am doing for myself is by no means complete but just to be aware, clearer and committed to making this change for myself is soooo powerful.

So this is my commitment for my change this week. Creating more opportunities to live out of the box. All this week I am going to challenge myself to implement ways to live out of the box in my thoughts, my actions and in my love for others.  Follow along in the blogs and on my social media for what this actually looks like. For someone like myself that lived in the box for so long, this commitment originally would have been scary to undertake. Now though it is a thrill to be here. Being rid of this fear of change creates a new peace and happiness that I cannot always pinpoint when describing to friends and family, but they see it in my smile and how much lighter I am in my presence. I am so much happier and smiling much more often that this change strikes the others around me.

Well my friends, there is my commitment to change this week, if you have another change to make his week you’ve been thinking of, go for it! Let me know how I can love and support you in this move. If you want to join me in the same commitment of getting out of the box, let’s do it! The blogs and content on www.changethisweek.org are going to be aimed in this direction so feel free to read along and participate. That’s it for now, thanks for reading and I’ll see you here again soon. Please follow me on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter @changethisweek

Snorkeling in Maui @jayryla
Snorkeling in Maui @jayryla

Jay Ry is the founder of ChangeThisWeek and lives and loves life with his two daughters in Los Angeles.